June Health Update...

June is already here! Wow!

God has been good, as always! We have been amazed, encouraged, exhausted, loved, helped, hurt, hindered, and lifted up!

Physical healing can be a circus...

Its always amazing to see how God works. Over the past month we have had some of the most difficult days yet, and somehow there has been grace to meet us there. About three weeks ago, I fell on my foot that I just had surgery on. After the pretty intense pain subsided, I didn't think much of it, other than hoping I didn't do any permanent damage. A few days later we realized that another hematoma had formed on the front part of my foot. This was somewhat discouraging as part of the delay in my ability to walk has been a hematoma on my heel that wouldn't go away. My doctor has not been willing to allow me to walk until it had completely absorbed. Unfortunately the first one still has not absorbed and now I have another one... What next?

Well, yesterday we decided that we were going to go out for lunch. You have to understand that is a very big undertaking in our world at the moment. I still can't drive or have my foot un-elevated and Carla, at 9 months pregnant, has to load and unload me and the wheelchair. But we were determined... cabin fever and all! On my way to get the one shoe I can actually wear and with my 16 month old, Isabella in my lap, my left foot (surgery foot) got caught between the wheelchair and my dresser. Ouch... Needless to say, we didn't get out yesterday. My ankle swelled up to about the size of a softball and I was in pretty severe pain for the rest of the day. Maybe we should start a reality show....

Dreams Fulfilled...

I think the most frustrating part for me is that I was hoping to be at least in a walking cast by now and taking some baby steps. Proverbs 13:12 says "Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but when the desire comes, it is a tree of life."

So, that covers the "Hope deferred.." part, but here is the "tree of life..." part.

"When desire comes..."

Most of you are aware that Carla and I have written music for many years and it has been a deep, deep desire in our heart to share our songs and minister. It has been a dream of mine for more than 10 years to record an album and distribute our music. We have believed that most of the music God has given us would be an encouragement and truly minister to those who would listen. Last year God spoke to us about getting our music together and to start recording a CD. We went to the studio of a close friend and started out of obedience. We were able to get my guitar parts and some vocals down. However, I started having problems with my elbow even then and had to take about an hour break in between each song. At that time I had no idea what was to come. I got a band of amazing guys together and started rehearsing the music to finish the project. We had one rehearsal, with four more to follow before getting into the studio. That was the second week in December. We took a break for Christmas and New years.

The week after new years, I had a severe bleed in my chest cavity and ended up in the hospital and have been in and out of the hospital ever since. I have had ankle surgery that I am still recovering from, and my elbow has accelerated in deterioration to the point of my being in danger of losing it. We had no idea that we would not be able to get back into the studio to complete the CD project. My prayer since then has been "Lord, I don't know why you told me to begin this CD, but if that's as far as it goes I am grateful You have taught me obedience."

That's just the beginning! Pastor Aaron came over to our house about 4 weeks ago and shared that he felt like God had put our music and completing our album on his heart. He felt like God had shown him it could be a way to raise money for us! I explained to him how I would love to see that happen, but I wasn't in a state to even get into the studio much less coordinate rehearsals, and/or all of the other administrative stuff it takes to get such a project completed. He said in his very loving way, "That's not what I'm asking. I am simply asking if you mind if I pursue it?". I said, "If you have the faith for that, run with it, but I just don't at this time!" He said, "That's okay, let me see what I can do".

He called back the next day and said he had found a producer who was willing to take it on for a severely discounted rate due to our situation. I laughed when he told me how much it was going to cost. "Discounted or not", I said, "I'm not sure how I'm going to pay our house note right now, much less pay for a CD." He said in his very passionate, loving way, "That's okay. I have the faith for it. I believe this is a God thing. All I'm asking is, are you okay with it?". Once again I just had to laugh. I told him that I loved the idea, and I couldn't have asked for someone better to try to care for and run with my dream!

Later that week he called back and said, "I think we've got it all worked out." He wanted me to call the producer, who I had never heard of before, but I spoke with him and found a bio on him and was blown away! He has worked on everything from American Idol projects to television shows and most recently, Dove award winning CCM artists like Brandon Heath. Once I got to know who this was, I couldn't believe what was taking place.

I was so humbled by what God was doing! I felt like God was saying "You (Jonathan) just wait right there. Let me run with this dream that I put in your heart to begin with, and let me see to it that it is fulfilled." I also felt like the Lord was reminding me that because this dream was His first, it was MORE important to Him that it was fulfilled, than it was even to me. That was a little hard to understand, since I've wanted it so bad in the past.

It is just like God to wait until I am completely unable to do anything in my own strength - literally - to fulfill the dream He started so long ago. This way ONLY He can be glorified! He is truly the Alpha AND the Omega! He is the Starter and the Finisher! We so often get frustrated with the "in-between" and yet that is the exact place where we were intended to be. We get so frustrated with the unknown, and yet that is where we are most dependant. We are so wrapped up in trying to determine when and how we are going to "pull off" this dream that is in our heart, when God fills us in on the dream simply to keep us in the loop, not for us to control it! He is simply letting us know hints of what He is doing.

What if we were able to just listen without assumption or expectation? What if we were able to obey without trying to lead God, but let Him truly lead us? I think we would have more joy, more peace, more trust, and less anxiety, less fear, and less disappointment! That sure wouldn't be bad. Even medical studies have shown that if we were to live like that we would live longer, more fulfilled lives. My obedience to begin recording months ago without any idea how it would all come together, ended up being the bones and foundation of what will be used to now complete the project.

Needless to say we are excited and yet still unable to do anything about it really! Funny place to be in! The CD won't be completed and available for purchase until later this year but we are very excited.

The start of a bigger vision...

In the process of all of this Sal Lee and some other friends got together and started a Foundation for our benefit. They established this as a way to help raise money for our family during this time of paying bills without income. We have been blown away by the generosity of their time and effort! It took quite a bit to get it all set up, but it is now in place.

The name of the Foundation is "Hope for Hemophilia" and if you would like to help, you can send a tax-deductible donation to "Hope for Hemophilia" at P.O. Box 2584, Mandeville, LA 70470. If you have questions or concerns you may contact Sal Lee directly at lee.salvador@gmail.com or 504.296.4800. He is more than willing to get you any documentation or information you may have questions about.

We are also very excited about this as one of our dreams is to be able to raise enough money over time to be able to help other people who suffer from hemophilia, and their families with financial support for surgeries and through their recoveries. We so desire to bring as much hope as we have been given. Our vision for this is huge - pretty lofty goals being that we haven't even accepted the first penny yet! Our dreams are big and our God is able!

Where we are and what comes next...

Carla says she is 10 months pregnant, but we are on the home stretch now! She is having the baby come rain or shine next week on June 12th! We are very excited! Carla will be at St Tammany Parish hospital for five days recovering from surgery with the baby. After that she will be on limited bed rest for a time, then on with the road to recovery for both of us!

We have been so blessed by all of you who have been so faithful to bring meals, to help with housework, to love on our kids and so much more! It has been wonderful to get to know many of you for the first time and others just to have your bright faces here to encourage us so frequently! We have been blessed beyond measure and are so grateful for your help and support!

Please continue to pray for us! We need extra grace for Carla during these next few weeks. Please pray for our kids, too. I believe they have been able to handle all of this so well and I am so very proud of them! However, I see the wear and tear on them too! Our prayer for them has been that they would have much stability and security even though they are with so many different people and places.

We would like to address a question many of you have asked. "Have you considered seeking financial help from the government for people with disabilities? Why not just go on social security disability?" Great question. It is one we have thought through, prayed about, researched and even attempted to apply for. In order for me to be accepted for government programs, I would have to quit my job first. Due to the absolute necessity of treatment for my illness, I have to be a part of a really great group health insurance policy which can only be obtained through the employment of large companies. I cannot go a single day without treatment. In addition, it is currently taking a minimum of three months (often longer) to be considered for approval for these government programs and many very needing families have been turned down. Even though our circumstances are extreme right now, we do anticipate much more normalcy in the future. We hope this brings a little bit more clarity.

Please continue to pray for financial resources for us! God has miraculously sustained us during this time and we have been so overwhelmed by your support! We are truly humbled at how many people God has used in this area from so many different places that we never expected! We are going to have some extra expenses with the baby being born in almost every area of our budget. If you would like to help financially and would like a tax deduction, you can call Sal Lee at 504.296.4800 or make a deposit to the Hope for Hemophilia Foundation at any Chase Bank or Edward Jones location. If you would like to or are able to make a monthly commitment for this season, they are able set up a ACH draft for you.

I am a firm believer in finishing what you begin. Six years ago, I opened an Edward Jones Financial Investment office. My doctor has agreed to allow me to work a couple of hours per week from home as I can. This is my next pursuit. Having a business that requires face to face contact on a regular basis is definitely complicated by my situation, but I am determined to be faithful even where I am at. I work strictly on commission. While I do not receive any income unless I am actively pouring myself into my business, it is in my heart to be faithful in sustaining what is in my hand and in being available to clients.

If you have read this far in, you know by now this has been a fairly long update, but it is only a fraction of what God is doing in our heart. I believe much of what God will do in us, and through us over the next 25 years, will be greatly affected by what we have lived out with you in these past months. Even though we have gone through great pain and discomfort, there has been a sense of great destiny. So what that means, I don't fully know. But I do know that the experiences that God has allowed us to have will be used to be a resource to lead others. Our hope is that though these months, weeks, days, and moments have been uncomfortable and downright painful, that God will use every last drop of it for His purpose!

Our prayer is that God's glory truly be revealed in our weakness! One of my favorite Psalms is Psalm 23:4 "though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; For You are with me...". The point wasn't that he walked through the valley of the shadow of death or that he wasn't afraid, rather that God was with him! When all is said and done, our hope is that when everyone looks at our circumstance people can say just that. "Even though they have been through so much, God is clearly with them!"

We love you all!